How My Tendency Helps Me Relate to Others

Katie Corbett holds the book "The Four Tendencies"

By Katie Corbett


We do not live or work in a vacuum. Even if you are a researcher in Antarctica or work in some other remote location, I would imagine you have to interact with others. Insights about personality can help you understand yourself and how you relate to those around you.


I learned of my Upholder tendency in the book, “The Four Tendencies,” by Gretchen Rubin. This knowledge helped me work with others more smoothly. It also helped me be more understanding and appreciate the unique gifts each of us has to offer.


I learned first and foremost that being an Upholder is rare. Few have this tendency to be able to fulfill both the expectations they set for themselves, as well as those expectations others set for them. This knowledge gave me a lot more patience when working with others, especially if they didn’t always follow through. Here’s an example of when this patience paid off.


I love book clubs. I can always get myself to finish the book before the discussion, even if it means I spend the entire day reading the book. I used to get annoyed when other members of the club would not have completed the book before coming to discuss it. Since learning of my Upholder tendency, I have become more patient with others and celebrate their presence at the meeting, as opposed to being irritated that they didn’t read the book.


I encourage you to learn more about your tendency and consider how you relate to others. It might help you become more patient and understanding, and it will probably help your projects go more smoothly.


Have any stories about how discovering your personality type helped you collaborate with others? Leave a comment and share it with me.


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