Avoiding the Comparison Trap

By Katie Corbett


Comparing yourself to others is a fruitless exercise that can leave you feeling discouraged. It can remind you that you aren’t where you want to be, make you feel like you aren’t good at the things you are trying to do, and lessen the sense of accomplishment you feel about the things that are going well in your life. I’m guilty of comparing myself to others, and I decided that I wanted to make a change so that I could be happier about my life and more confident in doing the things I wanted to achieve.


In “You Are A Badass,” Jen Sincero calls it the Comparison Trap. Thinking of comparison as something bad to avoid, rather than as a character flaw, is helping me change my mindset. Here are some ways I avoid comparing myself to others.


  • I think about what I’m grateful for rather than focusing on what I don’t have.
  • I plan fun things to do to take my mind off any lack of success I might be experiencing.
  • I contemplate what it is that I want when I’m comparing myself to others, because the need to compare might be coming out of a sense of desiring a specific trait or outcome.
  • I focus on my own goals, growth and development, rather than thinking about what others are achieving.
  • When I do catch myself comparing, I think about how glad I am that this person is in my life so that I know what is possible.


Remember that changing your mindset takes time. It can’t be done overnight, and it happens one thought at a time. Be patient with yourself and give yourself grace for the times you slip up and find yourself comparing.


Do you fall into the comparison trap? What helps you avoid comparing yourself to others? What mindset shifts do you find beneficial? Let me know in the comments.


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